Monday, August 22, 2011

~SP#15

So I thought maybe I should go back and add an explanation to this self portrait. I don't want people thinking *cough my mom* that I'm suicidal in any way. So this self portrait is kinda raw, but shooting me was very therapeutic (haha all puns intended). Oddly enough this one is not about death.  It's about how when people that you care for and put trust in lie to you and hurt you in a horrible way it kills pieces of your trust and innocence or whatever it is that causes you to believe in the best in people. Sometimes without even knowing it, your faith and trust in people is the collateral damage of relationships gone wrong. But I can't loose the part of me the believes the best of people because that IS who I am and how I live my life. That's what I love most about this world, that people can change, grow and become better, strong, wiser. That we can learn from our past mistakes and create a better, happier world. Things that have happened in my personal life recently have definitely shook my trust in others, but more severely my trust in myself and my judgement of people. I did something that's not normally like me, I tamped all these emotions down deep inside and just ignored them for as long as possible. Shooting myself in this self portrait was actually incredibly relieving and helped break up the stoney exterior I was fakin.' ;) 
And yes Mom, the Land of a Thousand Smiles will be back in my portraits next time. ;)

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Way to teach those fake Mandys (Mandies?)a lesson; how dare they pretend to be the real you!
Also, I have to say that you look absolutely killer in this one! ;)

Anonymous said...

Glad you added the description since I think I misinterpreted the photo -- I've never been the best at that anyway.
Glad you found the "shooting" therapeutic, and hope you're doing well. :)

Mandolyn said...

Haha, I liked your interpretation! :)

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