Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Western Toilet Oh How I've Missed Thee!

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when you are in sight
I love thee freely, thy clean, regal feel
I love thee cushy throne-like seat!
I love thee waving paper in the breeze
I love thee purely, white as snow
I love thee with a passion only you could know!

No sooner had we left the snowy white wonderland of Korea, then we realized that something very important was missing in the bathrooms...a western toilet! So I decided to find out which incredibly intelligent human being invented the Western toilet and thank them personally, only to discover that toilets may not be Western in origin at all! According to sources, the ancient Chinese may have been the first to use the throne! A flush toilet was found in a tomb of a Western Han Dynasty king (206 B.C. to A.D. 24)...they also invented toilet paper in the 6th century. That leaves only one important question: why in the world do most south east Asian countries still use the hateful squati-potties?!

I consider Inge and me to be real troopers...we can survive almost anywhere. No running water, no problem! No showers, shoot lets use the river! But this particular possessed squatty-potty, with its clogged pipes and hazardous stench, sent us packing, hauling our 100lb suitcases up and down the island coast asking bungalow owners and Inn keepers if we could see their bathrooms first before even checking their available rooms! In turn, we learned an invaluable lesson: you can judge the livability of an entire establishment from the state of their toilet. Below is a photo of the offensive poser commode!

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